Family, Friends & Fellow Officers Remember...

Dear Jessica,

This is a couple of days late but I couldn’t bring myself to go to your site on the 28th. I guess I figure if I didn’t go out here and write anything, the day would be easier. And on Saturday, I was too exhausted to even think or move.

We had your 4-year Memorial and a get together at the FOP on Friday. It was a long day but that’s the way I like it to be. If I keep myself busy, I don’t have time to think too much. It’s during the quiet times that I think about you the most and what has happened over these past years. This year, I started thinking about the friendships lost, the ones rekindled and the new ones created. Some of the new ones created are with parents and family members that suffered the same type of tragedy that we have. I am thankful for them because they understand what the day means and how you feel. Others are with members of the department. They feel the same lose that we do. You were family to them and they have opened their arms and welcomed us in.

Dad went to Jarvis on Friday and put a new badge in the sidewalk. We thought some kids stole it but come to find out it was from the winter weather. The Chief told us that someone from the neighborhood brought the old one up to the station, which was really nice of him or her.

There was a good turn out at the cemetery; family, friends, co-workers and their families. Jill came home along with Katie, Kelly and Kathy. Stephanie and Sharrie were there as well. I know it was hard for Jill but it was so nice to see her. I’m glad she came. As usual, Father Bob did a wonderful job and I know you were proud of the Honor Guard. They always want to do their best when it comes to you and they succeed. Emmi did a great job on the bagpipes. Back at the hall, Sue presented a bronze plaque that the department had made. It is wonderful and it means so much to us because it comes from your co-workers out of love and respect. I put together a presentation of pictures of you growing up. It was fun to do. Looking at the pictures of you as a little girl, showing how you grew into such a beautiful woman. I don’t know if you would have liked some of the ones I used but it showed a side of you that a lot of people didn’t get the chance to see and I think that’s important. Payton put on her Fraser uniform at the hall. She went around putting handcuffs on everyone and arresting them. She was too cute. Heaven forbid she goes up to be a cop.

Well, this is getting rather long. You just need to know that you are loved and missed by so many. You will never be forgotten.

Love and miss you so much,
Mom

July 30, 2006

This morning on the 28th was very busy at work...shots fired run came out and a shot was fired in my direction...I am ok and I know ,Jessica, you were looking out for me...Thanks for letting me go home and see my wife. I know that your are my angel and an angel for many others still fighting the good fight. Thanks for the back up....

Police Officer in MI

July 29, 2006

It really is hard to believe it's been four years! I miss meeting up behind Beecher and catching up. It's funny because no matter how early in the shift it was, you had always already made your way up to the pound and "checked" on all the animals. The world is a darker place without you in it... but all of us who knew you are much richer for the experience.

I know you are with us, watching over us every day. We miss you dearly!

July 28, 2006

To the loved ones and fellow officers of Officer Jessica Nagle-Wilson, and most especially to Jessica.

On this the fourth anniversary date of Jessica's tragic death, I wanted to remember and honor her memory. I never met Jessica, but in reading all the loving reflections feel as if I have gotten to know her. She was and is well-loved and well-respected. I am so sorry that she was robbed of her life at such a young age. Her picture is beautiful and her smile is heartbreakingly radiant. Her heroism and valor will be forever revered. Rest in peace, Jessica.

As the mother of another fallen officer, I find the reflections left by her mother to be especially touching. These brave men and women who gave their lives in service to their communities will always be our precious babies to the parents who gave them life. May you find peace in your heart today and may God hold Jessica in the sweetest part of his heart and the most gentle part of his soul.

This reflection is sent with the utmost respect for the dedicated service Jessica gave to her community and the citizens of Michigan, and for the supreme sacrifice she and her family made on July 28, 2002.

Phyllis Loya, mother of fallen officer Larry Lasater, Pittsburg Police Department eow 4/24/05

July 28, 2006

Wow, it is 4 years already. I know it is said every year how we can't believe it has been this long but it never feels that long. It feels just like yesterday that we got that call about what happened to you, I remember everything that happened that night it was horrible. Having to make the calls to your friends and everyone and tell them what happened, that was not an easy thing to do. Just like these past 4 years haven't been easy, there is so much that you should have been here for and you weren't. I am going to have a child in about 2 months and I fear that when he/she gets older and asks about you that I will have forgotten all of the good times that we had. I know that it won't ever happen but that is my fear. You will never be forgot.

Tomorrow we celebrate your life just the way we know that you would want us to. Lots of Beer and lots of card playing. That is the way we know you would want it. Everyone to have fun and remember all of the good times that they have shared with you, whether it is just one memory or a million memories. Just know that you will always be loved by many people.
Love you and miss you everyday.
Your sester,
Amanda

July 27, 2006

It will be 4 years since your tour of duty ended and I know the tears still flow from the hearts of those that love you so much. You are in their thoughts every single day. You are a true hero and will never be forgotten as a hero never dies. Your mother carried you in her arms when you were a small child, now she carries you in her heart and will for as long as she walks this earth as there is no greater loss than to lose a child, no matter how old that child may be. Keep watch over your loved ones and those still out on patrol. Wrap your wings around them and help them with their grief. You have not been forgotten.

Bob Gordon, father of fallen Chicago Officer
Michael P. Gordon, EOW: 8/8/04

Bob Gordon, Gold Star Father

July 24, 2006

I am listening to a song again and just remembering how we used to sing it at the top of our lungs, in your camaro, windows down on a nice summer day. That's probably the best memory yet.... I was reading elsewhere on this site as to how this all gets easier to accept through time, funny because sometimes its true- mainly focusing on all of the good things but then when it comes to planning things we should be doing together it just cracks that belief into pieces. After so many years you'd think these thoughts would fade and that we'd miss you less, sadly accustomed to missing your presence, funny how its actually just the opposite. The more we all go through and experience, the MORE we want you there, laughing and singing along with us. Pointing out somewhere we haven't been and planning a trip out there- or that just have to have item that we may never see again. Just goes to show you how much more you're going to be missed as time goes on...

July 19, 2006

Debbie,

I was donning my Sawyers t-shirt a couple weeks ago, and a woman approached me to read it. She said "Hmmm, I thought you were wearing a 'Jessica' shirt"....I told her that I wear that one too. Its sad that we have to honor our loved ones & friends this way.

I want you to know that I think about you a lot, and I feel blessed to have you in my life.

Kathy
SHPD

July 2, 2006

Jessica,

Still thinking about you all the time.. Every time I visit this site, I always look at your page and see your smiling face, just the way I remember you at FSU. I still think about going to the very site where you sacrificed your life for us. All of your friends from FSU still think about you and keep you in our prayers. Please watch over us while we continue the fight.

Trooper
Michigan State Police - Fellow FSU alumni

June 27, 2006

Jessica,

Grandma has been asking about you and wants to know why you haven't been by to see her. How do you tell a Grandma that her Granddaughter was murdered? So I just told her you were up in Heaven with Grandpa. She didn't understand nor does she remember what happened to you. I changed the subject to your wedding and showed her the pictures and after awhile she remembered that day. When she asked the same question about Grandpa, I told her he visited her when she was sleeping because I knew she talked to him in her dreams. Maybe you could just pay her a little visit once in awhile so she knows that you are there with her even if she can't see her.

Love,
Mom

June 10, 2006

You know its funny, just when I think everything is fine and getting better, you just sneak back into my head. Not that it's a bad thing because you know I'll never forget you or have another friend like you, but sometimes its hard to remember all the good stuff and all I can see is that we have one less friend to grow old with and that no matter what we do or who we meet along the way, one of the most important people, one of my closest friends, isn't here with me to experience it. Its great and all that you show up in little signs everywhere- like the song that just popped on the radio while I'm typing this- but sadly sometimes it doesn't feel like enough. I'll be going out to DC soon, and as excited I am for the trip, I have mixed feelings about going to the memorial again. Its so wonderful that you are honored so, but I'm sure I speak for plenty when I say that I would much rather be taking a drive with you rather than out to something honoring you. You're much missed!

June 9, 2006

Jessica,

I didn't know you but I feel honored I got to spend time with your parents and friends in DC this year. You were very special to many people. One of my good friends works at Hazel Park and through him I have met many of your co-workers and family. I think they are some of the most wonderful people to know. Thank you for watching over your brothers and sisters in blue. God Bless.

Friend

June 7, 2006

Happy Belated Birthday Jessica~! It never gets any easier for anyone still down here. Special days like your birthday make that fact more evident upon us all. I always wish there was something I could do for your family and friends day after day but I know there is nothing within my power to ease their sorrow...cause the only thing they wish for is for you to be here with them...There are no coincidences in life and your mother pointed that out to me quite poignantly the other day. I had chosen to be sworn in as a lawyer on your birthday. I was in my second year of law school when you were taken away from us...Vic's trial for attempted murder had just ended and we thought we could relax for just a minute together. Find peace somehow again through our shattered sense of justice...but then this madman hurt you and neither of us now, in our own way, believes we can ever find that peace again...mostly I believe that life is hell on earth and the point of living is to somehow create you're own little space of beauty...but creating that beauty is very hard when more officers continue to die and your family is called upon to be with them...your mother and father are something incredible....how they love you...so your mother made it to my ceremony and shared in my moment of success...she never ceases to amaze me with how much she gives of herself to others....you would be so proud and I was extremely honored to recognize her and you during my moment of happiness...that was my toast to you and my promise to continue to be the lawyer cops can trust and turn to in need. I hope you heard me and were there.
Keep standing guard over us all.

Sarah B. Mason

May 29, 2006

Jessica, although I never met you, it feels like I have gotten to know a piece of you through my friends who did. For that I proudly wear your badge number with a blue ribbon through it on my vest.

I went to the National Memorial this year. I rode in the law ride for you, and Gary Davis, Mark Sawyers, and everyone else whose name adourns those walls. I saw your name on the Wall, and many there who were supporting each other for you. To remember, to share, to live in your memory. I saw all the names of those lost within the last few years. I took pictures to remember.

I notice from the other entries that it was recently your birthday. I hope you had the best birthday Heaven can offer.

Unfortunately your ranks in Heaven have grown again this week. Dearborn Heights is entrusting one of its finest to the Angels in Blue. From what I have read, it seems you would be the perfect welcoming committee for Jason. Show him the ropes. And let him know that he wont be forgotten either.

Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glint on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you wake in the morning hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush,
Of quiet birds in circling flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there, I did not die.

Tracey
Novi PD Dispatch

May 28, 2006

Happy Birthday!
Your 30th! How I wish we could have celebrated this day together on earth...

I raise my glass (of wine of course) and toast my friend, my sister, to your birthday!

You are forever the angel on my shoulder and forever in my heart.

"Let it Ride" Kiddo!!!

XXOO
Suz

May 23, 2006

Jess,
I think I met you twice, and I wish I had more time to know you. We had plans to go to the casino and play let it ride, you, Matt, Suzanne and I, but it never happened. If we all had known, or at least went through life treating each day with the unknown of the next, we might have felt more urgency to make it happen. Today is your 30th Birthday in heaven, unfortunately, without all of those who miss you here on earth. I must tell you that I have now come to know you through others, your family and Suzanne mostly and I am grateful for that, as sad as it is to get to know someone through others. You have inspired many to be more like you, kind,compassionate and strong and to give from the heart. I know somehow you are always surrounding those who loved you and you loved, even though we can't see, we feel, not just your loss, but your spirit. I only hope we meet again someday, perhaps you can teach my Mom how to play poker in the meantime. Always in our thoughts, Happy Birthday.
Kelly

Kelly Strautz
Friend

May 23, 2006

Happy 30th birthday Jess... I hope you enjoyed the drinks we gave you. I remember my 21st birthday, you, sharrie and Randy took me to the bar and keeped giving me shot after shot after shot, and drink after drink. Then driving home you had to help me into the house when you couldn't even walk yourself. That was the best birthday ever, and that was the last birthday I got to spend with you.

Well I went and got my ultrasound done last Thursday to see if I was having a boy or a girl. Well the baby had its legs closed so we still don't know what it is. I know that you are up there just laughing. I thought maybe because we were getting the ultrasound done on the 18th that was going to be a good sign that for one it was going to be a boy and for two that you would let me see what it was.. I guess we will see if I can get another ultrasound.

Happy birthday again and I miss you and think about you everyday. I love you

Amanda
(your sester)

May 23, 2006

Happy 30th Birthday, Miss you so much!!!

May 23, 2006

HI JESSICA,

I want to wish you a happy birthday today. I know you are smiling with Jesus on this day and every day. It was an honor to stand post for you in Washington again this year. I hope we made you proud. There is not a day that goes by that we don't think of you or miss you. Say hello to Cheryl's dad in heaven, it is his birthday today too. I am sure you already have met Jim, he loves cops.

Love always,
Tom Cleyman

TOM CLEYMAN

May 23, 2006

The Big 3-0. I so wish you were here to celebrate. I think of all the other birthdays, and how much fun we had and how much fun we should be having right now. I know its selfish or whatever, but what I would give to be able to call you up right now and remind you of how OLD you are or send over a Over the Hill balloon or such. Just the silly old little things. I keep remembering all of the little things we'd do,like renting movies and stopping at Taco Bell, Boston Market, and Kroger's for Ice Cream and Mac N Cheese and spending the whole day watching movies and snacking. Or shopping at Target. All the little things we'd do and have such fun doing, that's just what made you one of my best friends- no one will or could even replace that. So just know everytime I stop at Target (or Marshall Fields!)for "a little something" or pull into Boston MArket for a side of mashed potatoes, I think of you. Everytime I sing along to the radio, I think of you. And of course any time I feel like going for a walk or run in the rain- I only am thinking of you! Happy big 3-0 Jess- you are missed so much.

May 23, 2006

Jessica, It seems like only yesterday that the "Aunts" were celebrating the birth of their 1st "Great Neice". Our large family has gone thru much since your arrival, both good and bad. Now 30 years have pasted and we mourn that you are no longer here with us. We miss you but know that you have joined the rest of the family who celebrate with the angels. I can imagine your b-day party today, Grandma B. will sing, while Uncle Barry raises his glass in a toast to you. You and your Grandpa will dance , Uncle Sonny will do a jig and in between Uncle Leo will give you many hugs and kisses. Tonight when all has settled Aunt Mary Ellen will challenge you to casnasta. Don't you two cheat! Celebrate to your hearts content while we here on earth remember the many Happy Birthdays you spent with us. Happy 30th.

Love ya,

May 23, 2006

Hi Jess, Happy birthday I think about you everyday.

May 23, 2006

HAPPY 30th BIRTHDAY, JESSICA

Love,
Aunt Nancy, Heather, and Danielle

A

May 23, 2006

Happy Birthday Jessica!

Today would have been your 30th birthday. So I stopped and picked up your cake and took it to the cemetery this morning on my way to work. I tried to light the candles and sing but they wouldn’t stay lit so I just sang. I was remembering some of your past birthdays. When you turned 16 and Dad bought you this car that you didn’t like at all. So you ended up with the yellow Camaro or when Grandma and I took you to Vegas for your 21st birthday. We did so much and spent so much money. The last day, we sat playing Keno at the Tropicana waiting until it was time to leave for the airport. We were so tired and didn’t have a lot of money to do anything else. And then on your 26th birthday, you were on your honeymoon. You came back saying you were now an old married lady. There should have been a lot more birthdays spent down here with us.

There was evidence that the girls had been there for their annual birthday celebration with you too. I’m surprised the groundskeeper left the bottles but I think they understand. As I was leaving, Matt was pulling up. I know that these last days must be very hard on him. I know he loves and misses you a lot. It was such a short time that you two had together.

Happy Birthday to you in Heaven.

Love you,
Mom

May 23, 2006

Happy 30th birthday Jessica.
Friends of your parents, they are so proud of you and miss you very much.

May 22, 2006